Underwhelmed

I am feeling thoroughly underwhelmed right now. I decided to do some baking (because I have cravings like you wouldn't believe) and I had a muffin and called it quits. Wasn't doing it for me. Plus, I just feel weird. I'm back to my belly getting tight and in return becoming nauseous. This is what I felt like the other day except the chest tightening was a little more prominent. Last time, Saturday I believe, I went to my midwife after having tightness below my chest, my belly becoming tight and nausea from morning until about 4 pm when I finally called. She took my blood pressure, measured my belly and even checked to see if I was dilated, which I sadly wasn't. She felt my belly while it was hardening and told me I was having contractions but it wasn't clear if they were BH or the real thing, but that I would know soon enough. Obviously, they were BH. Everyday since, my belly gets hard, but nothing else. Today, the tightness under my chest and the nausea are accompanying the contractions. I feel like my body is just screwing with me at this point and I'm just waiting and waiting. I finally understand that anxiety of the last couple weeks. Trevor is due in 9 days and I feel like it's an eternity away. It doesn't help that I need 5 pillows to help me catch some sleep, which is still interrupted by hip and pelvic aches and shortness of breath. Also, I'm starving, ALL THE TIME. Anyone else experience this at the end? I can't get full! If I do, I'm hungry a bit later. Doesn't matter what I'm eating and whether or not it's loaded with fiber and protein - I'm ravenous.  I mentioned on Facebook that I was going to try ridiculous induction techniques and I started to, but truthfully, I don't actually believe that these things work. I think it's possible, but not enough to put a ton of energy into trying. I made a spicy dinner because I love spicy food and I bounced on my exercise ball and rolled my pelvis around while Erik and I watched Revenge because... Easy. I didn't bother eating the pineapple because I hate the texture (but I might try today because I want to get over that anyway) and I haven't drank my red raspberry leaf tea yet because it tastes weird. Beyond some walking, I'm not interested in trying much else. I know that's he will come when he's ready, but I'm just praying that's soon.

Now that we have reached the last stretch, I am getting more and more anxious wondering about our little boy. I can't believe that physically, he is SO close to me yet I can't see his adorable face or kiss his toes. I can, however, feel a distinct foot in my side the majority of my day. I know that I'm about to fall crazy in love with a tiny human and I truly can't even fathom it. Am I going to be that obsessive mom that stares at him while he sleeps? Probably. No shame. I hope you all know that there will be an absurd amount of pictures of this little boy.

In addition to being anxious to meeting our son, I'm also excited to put my shoes on by myself, get off of the couch swiftly, shave my legs, make the bed without losing my breathe and... You get the point. I can't wait to get into a routine with little man. I know it'll take time, but I look forward to it. I can't wait until I can get a workout in while Daddy swoons over him. Seriously. I. Can't. Wait. To. Workout. I'm terrified that my skin won't snap back like it should, so I'm going to go slow and steady, hydrate and moisturizer as much as possible. Jules signed me up for Biggest Loser on base, so I have that to motivate me AND the fact that my insanely fit father will be here to visit in March and will inevitably have me working out. I think I'm truly underestimating how unfit I'll be after I give birth lol.

Enough of my ramblings, I had a lot to get out. We are more than ready for you, Trevor, so come on out!